Genesis 45:3 tells us "Then Joseph said to his brothers, "I am Joseph; does my father still live?" But his brothers could not answer him, for they were dismayed in his presence."
Finding the Christ-like conduct he wanted, Joseph breaks down and identifies himself---and his brothers are not happy to see him. He explains that they need to come to Egypt to escape the remaining five years of famine. He weeps over Benjamin, and after that "... he kissed all his brothers and wept over them, and after that his brothers talked with him."
The idea that you do not have to obey God's commands to get reconciled, because in Heaven God will quickly solve the problem, is not found in Scripture. Joseph successfully FORCED a reconciliation, but we'll see in the following Scriptures that there were still problems.